Ohmygoshohmygoshohmygosh.
It's the REAL Swisher Sweet. And he's layin' down some dope suburban trax toutin' his white-bread GANGSTA-ness. See this hurr biggie screen? It's locked on BET, 'cept when Scarface is on AMC.So what's it gonna take for YOU to become a straight-thuggin' GANGSTA?
Step 1: Get a laptop for Christmas. Homies from the 'hood can't lay down those ghetto beats without a mac.
Step 2: Lift public domain ghetto beats from somebody else.
Step 3: Plug in Wal-Mart-bought microphone for that keepin'-it'-real lo-fi sound.
Step 4: Drop dope rhymes about how much cash moneys you have, how bros from the streets respec' you, how you want to murder punks 'n' goths (!!), and generally how much better you are than errbody else.
Step 5: Wait for the honeys to flock.
So what urban jungle is Swisher Sweet from? Is he so hard cuz he was the only white kid in Compton? Was he raised on Eight Mile down 'round DEE-troit? Has he busted a cap in each of the five boroughs?
Naw, he's representin' the mean streets of Ottawa.
Ottawa, by the way, was recently declared the fourth cleanest city in the world.
I don't know how seriously this guy takes himself, but it's fun to assume that's he's trying really really hard. But these songs and images are so inane I have to believe that there's a joke in there somewhere.
NOTE: If people can't tell if you're for real or not, it either means your music sucks, or you're not funny.
So anyway, this is garbage. It's amusing, but only during the initial listening. It's not worth it, and for each digit Swisher Sweet's playcount goes up, you're just encouraging him that much more.
2 wiggas out of 10
